International Business

The Biggest Mistake In International Networking

by on 5 November, 2009

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International Business Networking

iconcatib The Biggest Mistake In International NetworkingLike most bloggers I often get link exchange requests. I usually just delete the ones that look like standard form emails. After all anyone who reads my blog knows how to easily get a link from me.  But yesterday I had a request come in through Twitter and the person said something that surprised me.  This person said “I always reciprocate”.  And this struck me as somehow being negative and I had to think about this for a while before I discovered why.

Free Links To Share Value

You see, I don’t do link exchanges. I give my links freely to people I find have something valuable to add to my blog. Now, although I give links freely,  I do have my quirks:

  • I decide where the link goes and what it looks like. When people ask me to change their links once too often I usually simply delete the link. The drawback of giving lots of links freely is there is not much time for maintenance.
  • I notice others who network “freely” too.  People who give simply because they like what you do. This is natural isn’t it? And it’s natural that I like networking more with these people too.

This lead me to dig deeper to find out what bothered me so much about this statement: “I always reciprocate”. Well, I noticed there was no giving freely, and no giving first. It is surprising the number of people who wait for you to give first before they give anything to you… and these are almost always the people who  give less than you do.  But this does not bother me. I’ll still put a link through to content I find of value for my own blog readers. So that wasn’t what bothered me with “I always reciprocate”. Then I realized something else.

Networking For International Business Development

I’m totally focused on networking for international business development. And this is where this “you give first before I give you anything” attitude just does not work. Now, I network heavily for my business. I have to. I’m based in France and I like working with English speaking clients. I network to develop my international business. Luckily the time difference works in my favor. The only time I can work with North Americans is from mid-afternoons my time onwards. So before my day comes to I end, I usually spend a good hour or two networking on the phone and by Skype. Of course, I also network through email too. That’s for the direct networking. But I also network extensively on social media, by providing useful information to my followers. This is how I identify the people I want to connect with.  I share non-stop because at the same time I actively work on developing my international business networks. Does this work? You bet it does. I’ve met some great professionals all over the world.

  • Some of them are great sources of referrals for my business
  • Some will become joint venture partners
  • Some are just becoming good business peers right now

Give First And Give Freely

These are people I would never have been able to meet without giving first. These are also people I would never have thought of seeking out.  My sharing information first an giving links first created the beginning of some very useful dialogues for my business. And you know what, it all starts with the attitude of giving and sharing first. This is what bothered me with the remark “I always reciprocate”.  I was interested in connecting with this person much more than a link exchange, but she does not have the right attitude for international business development. You simply need to be someone who shares first, without any expectations of anything in return.

Nurturing Trust In International Networking

This is one of the secrets to successful international networking.  You have to be comfortable making the first step.  In fact, you have to be very comfortable going down half of the path separating you from your international contacts. Occasionally it feels like I go three quarters of the distance alone.  This does not happen often, but it is this willingness to turn and go as far as necessary to greet people in their own comfort zones that creates international business opportunities. The biggest mistake you can make is not giving first.  This is a sign you are not really open to doing business with people outside of your own comfort zone. You do not have what it takes to develop an international business. If you have issues about giving your time and effort first then you need to do some personal work and carefully examine the personal baggage you have with regards to this.  This is the only path to successful international networking. It is linked to several important factors in building strong international relationships, the most important one being trust. Trust across cultures is difficult to establish. Cross-cultural differences create a minefield of potential trust breakers. And when you do not give first, but sit back and wait, or expect others to give first, this does not create a good environment for reciprocal trust in cross-cultural relationships. Besides, you don’t build a business by sitting back and waiting for someone to give you something to which you can reciprocate. Do you?  Start sharing and building your international business networks now. What about you?

  • How do you go about international business networking?
  • What do you like most about international business networking?
  • What are you biggest challenges in international business networking?

Please leave your comments below.

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Tagged as: business, business networking, comfortable, cross cultural differences, cross-cultural networking, culture, expectations, give, international, International Business, international business development, international business networking, international business opportunity, international clients, international leads, international markets, international network, international networking, International Sales, internet, lead generation, link exchanges, mass media, mistake, multicultural networking, networking, philosophy, reciprocate, share, social media, Social Media Networking, social networking, successful, telecommunications, trust

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"Cindy is a real authority on all things international marketing.
She is who I turn to when I have questions and you should too"
-- Chris Garrett, co-author of the "Problogger" book

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  • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne Lyken-Garner

    I so get what you’re saying here. When I find articles or sites I think would be helpful to my readers I usually provide the link for free. I don’t think about getting reciprocated for it. I also become suspicious of people who contact me asking to read their articles and promising to return the favour. I usually delete these.

    Like you said, eventually all your good work will pay off. You will not only have a site full of energy, eclectic material, and resourceful articles. You will also build up a platform of friends and supporters.

    Great article.
    .-= Anne Lyken-Garner´s last blog ..10 Crazy, Lazy Ways to Make Extra Cash =-.

    • http://cindyking.biz Cindy

      Hi Anne, thanks for dropping by and sharing. I think too many people approach marketing their blog simply by following the text book, which says link exchanges are good for SEO. Except they don’t stop and think about the human aspect and how to communicate to get those links. When you have a brand new blog it’s not easy to find people to link back to you. But an attitude of providing value to your readers usually leads you to sharing links from others… and people link to you when they see the value you are giving. I wonder what the text books for blog promotion will look like in a couple of years.

  • douglas hartley

    Your article was great. International business is so geared to reaching out and offering services to others first. What I am finding as well is that what you offer doesn’t have to be the most super profitable or the most insightful at all. Just offering an honest suggestion or simple viewpoint or helpful link is a great way to start to build a relationship. It’s the thought that counts, as Mom used to say.

    • http://cindyking.biz Cindy

      Hi Douglas, thanks for your thoughtful comments. I agree with you and reaching out and giving first makes it easier to people from other cultures to lower their natural barriers of mistrusting people who seem different.

  • http://www.wchingya.com Ching Ya

    An eye opener. If the same situation happened to me, no doubt that the word ‘reciprocal’ can be a little disturbing, especially if we’re focusing more on the quality of network and the content itself instead of a forced link-exchange method. It’s not that we’re against reciprocal but when it comes to (international) networking and a long term relationship building, to ‘give first’ is the way to go. At least it works for me, Cindy, Anne and surely many others as well.

    @wchingya
    Social/Blogging Tracker
    .-= Ching Ya´s last blog ..Seesmic Desktop Is Ahead of the Game with Twitter Lists Integration =-.

    • http://cindyking.biz Cindy

      Hi Ching Ya, I think we can be online for different reasons. And we get so focused on our own reasons and how we do things that it feels funny when we bumb into someone who’s there for another reason and a different way of doing things. In this example, I was so caught up with my own international outlook that it felt odd bumping into someone with an obviously more narrow approach to blogging and networking.

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  • http://egoist.blogspot.com/2009/05/start-of-weekly-workflow-review.html Martin Lindeskog

    Cindy,

    Your post got me thinking on how I could write a piece on link exchanges, SEO and the trader principle. I don’t think you should be obliged to give a link to someone by default. It is all about a voluntarily exchange between two parties (bloggers).

    I have been blogging since 2002 and according to Alexa Internet, Inc., I have about 200 sites linking in to my EGO blog.

    Here is an excerpt from my post, Start of Weekly Workflow Review:

    “One of the main points with implementing a new integrated work-life guide is to come in contact and meet new rational individuals, so I could have positive exchange with them regarding ideas and “stuff”, according to the trader principle.”

    Best Premises,

    Martin
    .-= Martin Lindeskog´s last blog ..THE BERLIN WALL =-.

    • http://cindyking.biz Cindy

      Hi Martin,

      What I question is not the value of link exchanges but the attitude people have when asking for them, or being asked for them. A “closed” mindset does not get you anywhere in intenational networking. And you can see this in people’s linking mindsets. If you comfort yourself by saying that you always reciprocate you still have a narrow vision. Because you are still waiting for everyone else to make the first step. That’s a problem in international networking. With this attitude you won’t get very far either unless you sell the hottest item on the market and everyone is clammering to meet you.

      Outside of the scope of international networking, and only looking at linking… I think there are similar values in giving your links first and focusing on the value to your readers.

      Sure you can easily get a large number of links back to you through link exchange tactics. Buts what’s the value. Google is getting more intelligent and will pick these up. Links from relevant sources have more value, whether you network for them with “link exchange” requests or through standard networking practices. But most of the “link exchange” requests I get add no value to my blog and my readers.

      What’s interesting as we move towards a more sociable web environment is that I think “link exchange requests” are a couple of years out of date. The current trend is towards more sociable networking where reaching out and giving first is more “natural”.

  • http://egoist.blogspot.com Martin Lindeskog

    Cindy,

    I think you are right about a more “sociable web environment”. The thing is that you have to base it on sound thinking. I see signs of group thinking and mass hysteria all over the place. It has to start with the individual.

    Case in point. This Twitter handle recently followed me:

    backfollower – I follow back

    “Bio Follow me and my followers and they will follow you back. Unfollow me and I will unfollow you.”

    Is this a (ro)bot or a real person? What’s the use of this? Should I block this Twitter user?
    .-= Martin Lindeskog´s last blog ..THE BERLIN WALL =-.

    • http://cindyking.biz Cindy

      Martin – oh dear, this reminds me of a childrens playground. If you give me a marble I’ll give you one. One of the social behaviors that shocked me raising children here in France is how many children say “you can only be my friend if you don’t talk to x”.

      Honestly, I don’t care “what” it is. I would ignore the first one and block the “person” if there was a second attempt at engaging in such games. It’s not even worth reading the tweet in the first place, is it? So why take it on? There’s an appropriate zen saying somewhere for the right attitude to have with this sort of thing.

      There are too many different types of players, games and networking rules all on one platform. You decide which “game” you want to play and run with that one. There are people who want to play 2 different games on one platform and they should have 2 dfferent accounts… otherwise I’m not sure how well they’ll be able to play either game.

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