Comments on: An Example Of Cultural Differences In Behavior http://cindyking.biz/an-example-of-cultural-differences-in-behavior/ Cross-cultural & international business skills applied to social media & web marketing Tue, 16 Mar 2010 10:24:49 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 hourly 1 By: Clarity In Cross-Cultural Communication – Tip 13 http://cindyking.biz/an-example-of-cultural-differences-in-behavior/comment-page-1/#comment-10375 Clarity In Cross-Cultural Communication – Tip 13 Sat, 13 Jun 2009 04:41:05 +0000 http://cindyking.biz/?p=3482#comment-10375 [...] An Example Of Cultural Differences In Behavior [...] [...] An Example Of Cultural Differences In Behavior [...]

]]> By: Cindy http://cindyking.biz/an-example-of-cultural-differences-in-behavior/comment-page-1/#comment-4135 Cindy Sun, 11 Jan 2009 12:29:59 +0000 http://cindyking.biz/?p=3482#comment-4135 Well, after many years having to adapt my own communication to different cultures in both personal and professional environments, it is easy for me to visualize the path that separates my own natural communication with that of a person in another culture. And I actually position my communication differently when talking to people in different cultures. So I know when I am "making an effort" and then during a conversation you can usually tell whether the other person is making an effort. And I can estimate and compare "effort". Other thoughts... I live in France where everyone expects you to give kisses on the cheek to say hello - and you are expected to say hello to this to far too many people. After 25 years, this is still foreign, it is an "effort" for me - I'd much, much prefer a sincere look in the eyes with a smile, and this never comes with the cheek kisses. Others here do not realize this, and do not realize that this is not real communication with me. Only very close friends do. Is this an issue for me? No. If I were to insist and refuse giving cheek kisses while living here in France, it would destroy or severely delay chances of real communication with just about everyone. So, if just about everyone I meet here in France does not realize that kisses are an "effort" to me... I probably miss the efforts other people make. And you often need to deepen the communication before you can see this. That's why you need to be quite far along the path that separates you from the other person before you can see this or not... Well, after many years having to adapt my own communication to different cultures in both personal and professional environments, it is easy for me to visualize the path that separates my own natural communication with that of a person in another culture. And I actually position my communication differently when talking to people in different cultures. So I know when I am “making an effort” and then during a conversation you can usually tell whether the other person is making an effort. And I can estimate and compare “effort”.

Other thoughts… I live in France where everyone expects you to give kisses on the cheek to say hello – and you are expected to say hello to this to far too many people. After 25 years, this is still foreign, it is an “effort” for me – I’d much, much prefer a sincere look in the eyes with a smile, and this never comes with the cheek kisses. Others here do not realize this, and do not realize that this is not real communication with me. Only very close friends do. Is this an issue for me? No. If I were to insist and refuse giving cheek kisses while living here in France, it would destroy or severely delay chances of real communication with just about everyone.

So, if just about everyone I meet here in France does not realize that kisses are an “effort” to me… I probably miss the efforts other people make. And you often need to deepen the communication before you can see this. That’s why you need to be quite far along the path that separates you from the other person before you can see this or not…

]]> By: Joshua U http://cindyking.biz/an-example-of-cultural-differences-in-behavior/comment-page-1/#comment-4130 Joshua U Sun, 11 Jan 2009 01:35:04 +0000 http://cindyking.biz/?p=3482#comment-4130 "Every time I feel as if I am doing 70% of the effort I evaluate my priorities. Of course, this is when I often concede that in reality I’m only doing 50% of the effort." - Can you explain that some more? This is something I've struggled with and I know a lot of people have a problem with feeling they are the ones doing all the work - not just in cross culture communication, but in any relationship. “Every time I feel as if I am doing 70% of the effort I evaluate my priorities. Of course, this is when I often concede that in reality I’m only doing 50% of the effort.” – Can you explain that some more? This is something I’ve struggled with and I know a lot of people have a problem with feeling they are the ones doing all the work – not just in cross culture communication, but in any relationship.

]]> By: Cindy http://cindyking.biz/an-example-of-cultural-differences-in-behavior/comment-page-1/#comment-4110 Cindy Sat, 10 Jan 2009 10:14:38 +0000 http://cindyking.biz/?p=3482#comment-4110 Hi Joshua, I wondered if anyone would pick this up. I do feel this is the danger when people put their hands over their eyes and say it is up to the other person from the other culture to do all of the work in bridging the cultural gap. The person doing all the work to bridge the culture gap develops superior skills and probably has more knowledge of what is actually going on in the conversation, or business negotiation. More knowledge is more power. And such a good communicator can potentially control the conversation. In practice, the person doing all the work can also decide not to put the effort in. Every time I feel as if I am doing 70% of the effort I evaluate my priorities. Of course, this is when I often concede that in reality I'm only doing 50% of the effort. :-) Hi Joshua,

I wondered if anyone would pick this up. I do feel this is the danger when people put their hands over their eyes and say it is up to the other person from the other culture to do all of the work in bridging the cultural gap. The person doing all the work to bridge the culture gap develops superior skills and probably has more knowledge of what is actually going on in the conversation, or business negotiation. More knowledge is more power. And such a good communicator can potentially control the conversation.

In practice, the person doing all the work can also decide not to put the effort in. Every time I feel as if I am doing 70% of the effort I evaluate my priorities. Of course, this is when I often concede that in reality I’m only doing 50% of the effort. :-)

]]> By: Joshua U http://cindyking.biz/an-example-of-cultural-differences-in-behavior/comment-page-1/#comment-4108 Joshua U Sat, 10 Jan 2009 05:44:38 +0000 http://cindyking.biz/?p=3482#comment-4108 "In business, do you want to hand over control to the other person?" Now that's a pretty good way of motivating people to be the proactive person in any relationship. “In business, do you want to hand over control to the other person?” Now that’s a pretty good way of motivating people to be the proactive person in any relationship.

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